Reason, Season, & Lifetime

One of my mentors shared a valuable piece of wisdom with me. "People come into your life for a reason, season, or for a lifetime." However, I'm puzzeled on how to disguish on which people in my life fit into which category.

When it comes to business settings, I can be a social butterfly. I have the ability to create genuine positive relationships in the professional environment. Unfortunately, I wish I could say the same for my personal life. Although I choose to keep a small "circle", something inside me wants to be able to open up, and let people in, actually allowing myself to trust people. Supposing that safety is of greatest concern, I fear of becoming vulnerable. My expecations for people's character are relatively low; therefore, I hesitate to engage in personal relationship, assuming that eventually, I will one day be betrayed.

Through growth & maturity, I've become more able and confident to having deeper personal friendships. Inner strength has served as a leverage in my life, to not only invest in personal relationships but initiate them as well. Learning that building human relationships is a skill in the business environment, I've been able to apply those skills to manage the relationships in my personal life.

Friend or foe, I'm learning to appreciate every encounter with people, for there is something valuable to gain from everybody. So I often ask myself "Why do I want to risk safety and trust people?" Well, to be honest, I really want people to want to take that risk with me. Let's just say that I've experienced my fair share of reasons and seasons and not enough lifetimes.

Learning - A Delayed Reaction

Sometimes we learn some of the most valuable lessons in the most unexpected way.

In my ealier college years, I remember taking a couple of GE courses in world literature instructed by professor Dr. Lisowski. His class included one simple daily routine assignment that has made his class unique compared to any other class I've completed. Students were not required to participate in this assignment and those who opted to do so, did not receive any credit towards their grade average. My professor called this assignment, "Active Critical Thinking".

At the beginning of each class, Dr. Lisowski would reserve a section of the dry erase board and label it "Active Critical Thinking". While Dr. Lisowski conducted roll call, students were free to post anything on the board that provoked (the title of this assignment) active critical thinking. This post could be a quote, phrase, picture, word or even a single character. This post did not have to relate to world literature. In fact, most of the time, none of the posts were related to the class whatsoever. Once Dr. Lisowski finished calling the roll, he would dedicate about five (5) minutes of class discussion for any posts on the board.

This activity was a great way, (especially for those 8am classes) to get students' minds stimulated. A lot of times students would post quotes that were significant to them personally. One student posted a quote in Latin that I had seen for the first time, "Dubit ergo cogito, cogito ergo sum", meaning "I doubt therefore think, I think therefore I am." Sometimes the posts were simply random, yet entertaining and humorous. I remember one Friday morning, a student posted "TGIF". Often times, the mornings after a televised sport event, one might post "How about them (sports team)".

Surprisingly, the meanings to most of the posts were not so obvious and discovering the message was an exciting challenge. It was very satifying to see my peers contribute in this activity as it also increased my interest in learning.

I really appreciate Dr. Lisowski including "Activity Critical Thinking" as apart of his routine lesson plan. He would only serve as a moderator during this activity; however, he would occasionally engage in class dialogue considering he was learning just as much as the rest of the class. But I believe he thoroughly enjoyed the interaction amongst his students as they particpated in healthy positive discussion.

Empowering students to discuss topics that we deem important and challenging our minds to determine the meanings of these posts has accomplished what I suspect few teachers have, promoting students teach students.

Thank you Dr. Lisowski and I apologize that it took me so long to understand and value the lesson you were trying to teach.

A New Addition to My Shoe Collection

I know it's not the Italian handcrafted dress shoe from Johnston and Murphy, but it is still a very stylish shoe in my opinion.

I found this mahogany Alfani dress shoe on sale for $49.00 at Macy's. This shoe has a very sleek, sophisticated, and polished finish to it. I've been wanting a new pair of brown dress shoes for quite some time, & I've finally made the investment.

I'd really appreciate your feedback, positive or negative, I can roll with the punches.

7 Habits You'll Want to Pick Up

Stephen Covey, author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People has published one of the best pieces of literature I've ever had the pleasure of reading.

A good friend and mentor recommended this book to me a while back when he introduced Habit #5 (Seek First to Understand, Then to be Understood) as apart of his leadership development presentation to myself along with my fellow student government cabinet members. Ever since, I've been anxious to get my hands on a copy so that I could absorb as much knowledge from it as possible.

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People is about focusing on paradigms. Our paradigms often hinder us from successfully performing tasks, completing projects, and managing human relationships to the best of our abilities. Covey explains that we often try to solve problems without analyzing the symptons to provide an accurate diagnosis. Before we fully understand the delimma we automatically shift responsibility on others. Our paradigms however, are frequently the issue and they simply need maintenance to eliminate and prevent future issues. We can alter our paradigms by improving our habits. This book outlines 7 effective habits to succesfully enhance our paradigms.

Habit #2 talks about "Beginning with the End in Mind". To know the end, you have to know where you going; therefore, Covey includes an exercise that involves visioning your own funeral. While reading this book, I did practice this activity. I imagined myself driving to my funeral, noticing who attended, observing their facial expressions, and listened to Eulogies from friends, family, co-workers, and church members. I even approached the casket to see myself lying there lifeless. The objective is to listen to the eulogies to determine what the end is, in other words our deepest goals. This exercise will then help you to develop your own personal mission statement. I haven't written mine yet, but I will publish it as a blog post as soon as it is finalized. This was just one of the many interesting activities this book has to offer.

I encourage you to purchase this book to not only read for yourself, but to keep in your personal book collection for reference and review. There is so much knowlege in 7 Habits for Highly Effective People that you will want to read it multiple times.

$400 Italian Handcrafted Dress Shoe

Man Oh Man!!!.....one of these days....

Check out this burgendy calf, Ecker Cap Toe, made from the finest Italian leather, full length cushion for that lavishing comfort. Priced at $395.00.

You all just don't understand, it is a goal of mine to be able to shop in a store such as Johnston & Murphy and have the "ability" to buy anything: a belt, tie, cuff links, ....if I could just walk out with an empty shopping bag it may fulfill some area of satisfaction.

Every time I walk in that store, I become overwhelmed with this feeling of unbelonging. When the sales representative asks me if I need any help, I proudly say, "No sir, I'm just window shopping". This store has some of the highest quality men's dress apparrel I've ever gazed my eyes upon. I cannot wait for the day I can walk in Johnston & Murphy, and not just to buy something, but also to not worry about how I am going to pay my phone bill for the next four (4) months. Somethings gotta give.

As for now, I suppose Macy's and JC Pennies will suffice. Can somebody say "CLEARANCE"!

The Dream Job

Picture this!

Working for a company where everyone exchanges a warm smile and greeting with every encounter. Leadership training is not only provided, but is composed of entertaining activities, while also designed to develop and improve your skills. The organization celebrates times of personal accomplishments. Shows sympathy during times of endearment. Even during tough economic times, jobs remain secure because rentention is top priority.

Imagine everyone working to the best of their ability consistently everyday, because they want to. Can you even fathom a culture like that? Where everyday is an exciting adventure and working seems like fun.

I just finished reading this great book entitled, Lessons in Loyalty by Lorraine Grubbs-West. This book includes nine (9) lessons on how to achieve a culture such as the one describe above and within each lesson, several principles are outlined.

Lorraine shares her experience at Southwest Airlines to support the lessons and principles discussed in the book. According to Lorraine, Southwest places high value on their employees byinvesting time, money, and love into their human resources, one employee at a time.

After interning for Nationwide Insurance for just a couple of months, I've noticed that the company models the same principles & lessons illustrated in the book. Since the beginning of my internship, everyone has been very welcoming and supportive. Anything that I could possibly need, the Nationwiders (as they call themselves) are more than willing to offer assistance.

I did notice that Nationwide is comprised of many associates that have been employeed with them for thirty-five (35+) years. In my opinion, that suggests that Nationwide is employee-focused. After job shadowing some of the associates, many have expressed how Nationwide allows one move into any field that he/she is intersted in, which is great! Employees need to be able to perform a job they like. Nationwide works with the employee to find a field that is most compatible with his/her skills and interests. That is just one of the various reasons why people are so dedicated to the company.

Below are the nine (9) lessons in loyalty

1. Hire Attitude-Train Skills
2. Immerse Everyone in the Culture Immediately
3. Keep 'Em Learning
4. People Give as Good as They Get
5. Find the Kid in Everyone
6. Do More with Less
7. Luv 'Em in Tough Times
8. Do What's Right
9. Nurture the Corporate Family

If you want to be apart of a work culture that accepts, celebrates, embraces, develops, and understands everyone, read Lessons in Loyalty, so that you can be equipped with the knowledge on how to identify an organization that fit's this mold. If your a manager, supervisor, or any type of company leader, use this book as a resource tool to provide your employees with "the dream job".

The Stacy Adam: Business Fashion "No No's"

Gentlemen, my friends...The shoes illustrated in this post are not intended for any sort of "professional" business engagement.

Before I continue, allow me to emphasize that this is strictly my "opinion".

These shoes scream Jazz Club. Now, I've actually seen some Stacy Adams that I consider acceptable for the business environment. (Although I still would not wear them)

- If your shoes are two-toned, calico, animal print, or multi-colored leave them in the closet.

- If your shoes have the golden shoelace tips, leave them in the closet.

- If your shoes have the golden rim in the front, leave them in the closet.

- If light reflects off your shoes in the shade because they're patent leather, leave them in the closet.
- If your shoes are blue, red, orange, pink,... and they match your three (3) piece Stacy Adam suit, leave them at the store!

I just wanted to get that off my chest. Again, this is just my "opinion".